Talking Tuesday at a Chinese Restaurant

(at a Chinese restaurant.)

Me: “Does that say JELLYFISH?!”

Dinner companion #1: “…Yes.”

Me: “What part of jellyfish do you eat?!”

Dinner companion #1: “I don’t know, the tentacles?”

Me: “But dude, that’s poisonous! How-Why-I’m so confused I want to order it and see.”

Dinner companion #1: “Don’t be silly. You won’t eat it.”

Me: “I know -that-. But it’s JELLYFISH! How awesomely interesting!”

Dinner companion #1: “Just order the beef already. Sheesh.”

Me: “FINE I WILL THEN…Are those LIVE FISH in that tank over there?!”

Dinner companion #1: “Yes. You don’t eat fish though.”

Me: “I eat some fish thank you very much, just… ooo Shark fin?! DUNDUN *makes Jaws music noises*”

Dinner companion #1: *orders her meal, and Mongolian beef for me* “Just shush.”

Me: *thinks “My beef comes with BAMBOO?! I’m like a panda!”*

——

(A waiter comes over and offers me a fork (there are chopsticks on the table))

Me: “Sure…Thanks.” *thinking might as well let them give me the pity fork in case the chopsticks don’t work out*

Dinner companion #1: “Haha they feel sorry for you!”

(later during dinner, Dinner companion #1 watches me deftly pick up a walnut from across the table with my chopsticks)

Me: “Oh yea, I have chopstick skills now! *flexes* *drops walnut*”

(I didn’t really drop it, but you should have seen me ‘use’ chopsticks when I first started. I use the word ‘use’ liberally as it was more like watching a panda ice skate.)

——

(Food arrives, the third member of our party has ordered Cod)

Me: “Ooer! That looks pretty all… dissected like that. *eyes fish tank on wall*”

Dinner companion #2: *eats fish silently*

——
Fresh Cod

Exaggerated slightly

Needless to say, I’m a bit culturally challenged. Just a bit. (The food was fantastic though, and the way the cod was presented it did really look enticing.) And yes, I’m that annoying person who heckles everything at dinner, somewhat akin to a child. Someone has to pretend they’re funny, right? Just don’t laugh or show a hint of a smile, that’ll just encourage me. I should have tried the jellyfish.

Talking Tuesdays are the creation of Reputation@Stake over at The Stupid Bet. Or so we think.

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5 Responses to Talking Tuesday at a Chinese Restaurant

  1. TS Hendrik says:

    I wish you’d tried the jellyfish cause than I could be all ‘how’d you like the jellyfish’ and then you’d be all ‘…’. See, I had to leave that blank cause now we’ll never know.

    • Not the feared “…” blank!

      I’m kicking myself that I didn’t. Or would be if I wasn’t trapped in my blanket fort. Definitely going to make an effort to go back and try, looks like it’s not just me that needs closure.

  2. If you ever do try it let me know. I’ve eaten shark and octopus. Both rather bland, but I’m glad I tried them. And how bad can jellyfish be, they’re like 98% water, so you could probably drink one. “Yeah, I’ll have the J-Fish on the rocks, and a slice of lime, not lemon, ’cause that’d be gross.”

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